In God’s promise…we find healing. - by Rod Kalajainen

It’s been an eventful year for our family…with a mixture of good things and profound sadness.  In mid-August, Jan’s father died unexpectedly of a ruptured aorta; in early November my father was diagnosed with end-stage pancreatic cancer and died two weeks later.  A few weeks ago, Jan’s Uncle Bill died and a few days later we had to say goodbye to our almost 20 year old cat.  Our fathers were both Christ-followers, and our profound sense of loss is tempered by the knowledge that they are with the Lord.

At the same time, life goes on.  We continue to fulfill our obligations at work – which were many in the season leading up to Christmas – and to our family and friends.  Even though we may have wanted to “stop the world and get off” for a bit so that we could recover emotionally and physically, there has not been that opportunity.

In reflecting on all these events recently, I am reminded of a story in Luke’s Gospel (Chapter 24) where two people are walking together on the road.  And you can tell from the way they are walking that they are not happy.  Their bodies are bent over, their faces are downcast, and their movements slow.  They do not look at each other…and their labored words vanish into the air as useless sounds.  Life, for them, has become emptiness, disillusionment and despair.

They can hardly imagine that it was only a few years earlier when they had met someone who had changed their lives, someone who had radically interrupted their daily routines and had brought a new vitality to every part of their existence.  They had followed this stranger and discovered a whole new reality hidden in ordinary activities…a reality in which forgiveness, healing, and love were no longer mere words but powers touching the very core of their humanity. 

This stranger from Nazareth had made everything new.  He had made them into people for whom the world was no longer a burden but a challenge, a place of endless opportunities.  He had brought peace and joy to their daily experience. (adapted fromWith Burning Hearts, Henri J.M. Nouwen)

We know what it’s like to be them, don’t we?  Some of you in this congregation have lost loved ones this year, as well.  We know what it’s like to feel like we’ve lost our grip, to feel the energy that fills our days and nights leave us.

How are we to deal, then, with our losses?  Hide them?  Live as if they never happened?  Keep them away from our friends? I would like to suggest another possibility…mourning.

Henri J.M. Nouwin suggests that we must mourn our losses.  We cannot talk or act them away, but we can shed tears over them and allow ourselves to grieve deeply.  “To grieve is to allow our losses to tear apart feelings of security and safety and lead us to the painful truth of our brokenness.”  Our grief makes us experience the fact that our own life is anything but settled, clear, or obvious…rather, everything is constantly shifting and changing.  “And as we feel the pain of our own losses, our grieving hearts open our inner eye to a world in which losses are suffered far beyond our own little world of family, friends and colleagues.  It is the world of prisoners, refugees, starving children, and countless human beings living in constant fear.”

How true.  And in the middle of our grief, we realize that others are and have experienced incredible suffering…far beyond our own.  Jan and I have also felt the genuine love of this congregation, our friends, small group, and others who have taken time to express their concern for us, send a card or call.

Several people have asked us how we are doing.  In short, we are doing okay.  Because we have discovered that in the midst of the pain, there is a strange and surprising voice who says:  “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.”  That’s the unexpected blessing that is hidden in times of grief.  Somehow, in the middle of our tears we find that we are blessed by God.

Our hearts may be broken when we lose people we love dearly. But we are people of hope.  Grief doesn’t have to lead to resentment and other destructive forces in our lives…we can discover a song of gratitude for the One who promises “My grace is enough for you!”  And in God’s promise…we find healing.

Happy New Year!
Rod